O Captain My Captain

captainderek @ 2005-07-06T21:39:00

2005-07-07T01:40:28Z

Double-yew tee eff, y'all?

I mean... POSEDNIK? You have to be kidding.

captainderek @ 2005-06-21T23:27:00

2005-06-22T03:28:51Z

Ahahahahahahahahahahaha that was AWESOME. Five hits, five runs scored, what?

Oh, and we won. :D

captainderek @ 2005-06-07T16:47:00

2005-06-07T20:52:09Z

Hey everyone

Sorry I haven't updated in a while - we started winning when I hadn't posted, and so even though I know it's kinda stupid, I got all superstittious and stuff and decided I couldn't post. Also people started inviting me out to parties and stuff again, so I didn't really have time anyway (oops). And then we started losing, and I got too depressed to post too much. So anyway.

Not much to talk about lately, just in the old grind of the game. Things are going ok for me personally, but the team is so hot and cold. I don't know what's going on this year - I'm still trying to be optimistic and lead by example and all that, but privately? I have some doubts. This is not the same Yankee team we used to have.

The only news I really have to report is that the Red Sox are going to be on QEFTSG. I know it's silly to be jealous, and I'm not really, since god knows I don't need a gay man to show me how to dress or groom myself - my mom taught me just fine, thanks - but I have to admit it would be fun to go out shopping with those guys, especially because I think they give you a lot of free stuff.

Anyway. Got to get to the park for the game and stuff, sooo....

Jeter out!

captainderek @ 2005-05-11T23:57:00

2005-05-12T04:07:17Z

Ok, so maybe five in a row is cause for celebration. And if that's not, then maybe going 2-5 with a home run and a stolen base and NO ERRORS is!! Today was a pretty good game. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little concerned when we gave up five runs in the first inning, but I said to myself, "Derek, it's only the first inning and there is plenty of time to come back. Just get on base to start things off and trust your teammates to battle back with you." And they did! It was so cool. Clearly my leadership is working again. I don't know what was wrong with it for a while there but the Yankees are Back! Tino especially. God I missed him. Also, Hideki-san the man, working the RBIs. You go, dude.

OH, and RJ! What's this I'm hearing about you giving facials? How come you never offered me any of this special cream? I totally need one, have you seen these pictures of me lately in the papers? I look positively haggard! Next time we have a B&J night you'll have to bring some.

ok, I can't decide whether I should go out and party or pack my stuff for Oakland. I think there's time for me to shop for new stuff in San Francisco (and OMG I love going out there; it's not quite like New York but the atmosphere is so friendly and happy and... what's the word I'm looiking for? I hate when this happens)... I think I still have a couple hours before my plane leaves so we'll see what mood I'm in. :-)

Jeter out!

captainderek @ 2005-05-09T22:23:00

2005-05-10T02:42:24Z

Three in a row, bitches. How do you like that?

I realized, after my fifth tequila on Saturday night, that I totally overreacted to that win against the A's. I mean, how sad. A single solitary win is not cause for celebration - the only win after which a player should show excitement is the game in which they win the World Series.

On the other hand, I was definitely super-happy (and, uh, shocked) by KB yesterday. The inconsistency crap drives me nuts.

Oh, and I'm supper annoyed because I only got one hit tonight and no longer have the best average on the team (probably residual hangover, I don't know how boomer3 does it) and also I made an ERROR which is NOT COOL. I mean, if I want more Gold Gloves and stuff I can't keep doing that. I'm going to have to take extra-long BP and fielding practice tomorrow so i can be more leadery soon. I'm going to head to bed now, actually - tomorrow I'm going to kick it up a notch (hahahah I love Emeril) - I think I'm ready now that the team is doing a little better and everyone's getting along.

Who knew all I had to do to get us back on track was bitch out a certain someone on national TV? HAHAHA roflmaololetc.

captainderek @ 2005-05-07T17:10:00

2005-05-07T21:15:59Z

START SPREADING THE NEEEEEWWWWWWWS
I'M LEAVING TOOOODAAAAAAAAY
I WANNA BE A PART OF IT
NEW YORK, NEW YORK
THOSE LITTLE TOWN BLUUUUUUUUES
ARE MELTING AWAAAAAAAY
I'LL MAKE A BRAND NEW START OF IT
IN OOOOOLD NEW YOOOOOOORK

YANKEES WIN YANKEES WIN YANKEES WIN BOO YEAH WE ARE THE BEST WE WIN WE WIN WE WIN!!!!111!!! My calm eyes and intangibles are finally working again, yusss!

MOOOOOOSE shut the A's DOWN - complete game four hitter what?! Shout out for mah shut out, MOOSIE!

And, best of all, it was a day game so I can go out and partayyyyyyyy!!! RJ, save the SuperFudgeChunk for another day! Tonight, urrrybody in the club gettin tipsay! Captain's orders! It'll be like a team building exercise or something. Aw yeah.

captainderek @ 2005-05-07T12:20:00

2005-05-07T16:30:43Z

I don't even want to talk about the game last night. I can't even trust Mo and Tino now? I mean, some people I'm not surprised when they make stupid and costly errors and then give me crap about it, but Mo and Tino were always nails. And now...

I'm sorry, that was a stupid thing to say. We all make mistakes and I know they were trying their best. Everyone's pressing (I only got one hit) and maybe even trying too hard. I think we just need to get our confidence back. But the only way I can think of doing that is to win. Or maybe hypnosis. Hm. Anyway, the team really needs to just stop fighting and blaming eachother for everything that goes wrong and suck it up and play hard and just WIN GODDAMNIT.

I really thought last night was the night we turned this thing around - we came back and tied up the game, and I was all set to grind out a 14-inning game or something. I started doing my visualization exercises, and man, I could taste that walkoff homerun. But it all fell apart in the 10th and we just couldn't come back after that. I never thought I'd see the day that the Yankees couldn't come back.

This is just sad, man.

captainderek @ 2005-05-06T13:56:00

2005-05-06T18:03:29Z

Another depressing article: Even the New York Times is picking on us

Although like I said (they quoted me a bunch of times - probably because I'm the captain, I guess) there are really no more excuses. We're just playing like crap. I don't know if it's because everyone on the team expects to win without working hard and helping eachother out, or because some of our players don't even know what city we're supposed to be in half the time, but it is time to say it. We suck. We are sucking. We have sucked. Hopefully we will not continue to suck. (And also, holy crap, I look old in that picture!)

I don't know what to do to be a better captain or more motivational and stuff. Seriously, any of you guys on the team - what can I do? More importantly, what can you do to set a good example and lead? Mr. Torre's already had like eleventy billion meetings and if he, the man who lead this team to one of the most dominant stretches of baseball ever (yes 1996-2000 and no I will not let it go), can't motivate us then what the hell chance do I have? I just have to try to lead by example and play the best I can and not make errors that allow two runs and things of that nature.

At least we're back in New York. It's funny, the Stadium used to have such an aura around it, of invincibility and all the ghosts of past dominant teams, but this year it feels almost like any other stadium full of drunk New Yorkers. I feel like Jorge and Tino and me are the only ghosts still sticking around. :(

Anyway, better get back to practice - leading by example. Yes. That is what I will do.

captainderek @ 2005-05-05T23:50:00

2005-05-06T03:50:11Z

I almost forgot:

I WIN THE AWARD FOR THE BEST SHORTSTOP IN THE WORLD! And I look really skinny in that pic too! Yay!

This almost makes me forget that we are playing sub-.400 ball.

I have to go cry myself to sleep now.

captainderek @ 2005-05-05T19:49:00

2005-05-06T00:12:18Z

Okay. I know some people seem to think I'm not doing a good job as captain, because the team has been playing crappy. And I know maybe I haven't been as supportive as usual to the new players and stuff because I've been so depressed lately. I mean, it's hard for me to mentor Robinson Cano when I can't look at him without remembering Soriano and then just wanting to burst into tears, because what the hell, Soriano was awesome and we traded him. And maybe I keep to myself a little more around some of the free agent guys, but you know, they all have their own posses and stuff, and nobody can talk to Sheff or K-B anyway, especially when we're losing and they're extra pissed off all the time.

But that is not the point. It has come to my attention that maybe some people think they could do a better job as captain, or think that they are a better player than me even though, hello, who's playing shortstop for the best baseball team ever, ME, while some other people haven't ever won a World Series. But that isn't the point either. I was talking to Tino and Jorge the other night and we all think that the team would be playing much better if everyone on it knew what it really is to *be* a Yankee - not just, like, any asshole who George buys, but a real 1996-2000 Yankee. But what is it to be a Championship Yankee? What is it to be a Dynasty Mystique Super Yankee? We decided to make a list. And here it is:

1. Play hard and go out expecting to win every day.

2. Don't expect to carry the whole team on your own - know that you can contribute, but let every other player, from the relief pitchers to the bench, know they are as important to success as you are.

3. Don't expect the rest of the team to carry you. Work hard, train hard, and be ready to contribute when you are needed, no matter what role you are asked to play, whether you're asked to switch positions or pinch hit or ~~inject steroids into Giambi's ass~~ whatever.

4. Support and encourage your teammates, but do not condescend by offering to help them work on stuff, or they will resent you. If you are doing #1-3, younger players will know you are there and willing to help, and they will come to you. This is important.

5. Don't seek out the limelight, but if the media pay attention to you (they will), deal with them honestly and gracefully and with a sense of humor. Also don't make yourself a hero out in the real world - volunteering is great, but you don't need to pretend to be Superman and save people's lives and stuff. That just makes you look like a self-promoting assface.

6. Maintain a friendly, or at least cordial, relationship with players from other teams. In addition to promoting the classy, sportsmanlike attitude of the Yankee franchise, it's always good to get along with other players since you never know when someone might get traded. You can also get lots of good gossip and tips on ~~what clubs to visit in different cities~~ how to face tough pitchers.

7. Don't be two-faced.

That's all we could really think of. We were trying to come up with 26, but the margaritas caught up to us after #7. The other 19 were just really silly. No, I won't tell you what they were.

Anyway, we're still losing, a lot, but last night at least we had some offense. I'm trying to look at the bright side, but I don't know what I can do to make these guys want to win. :(

Jeter out!

captainderek @ 2005-05-03T10:24:00

2005-05-03T14:25:18Z

Someone please kill me now.

I'm going to skip workouts today and curl up with some Ben and Jerry's and All My Children reruns.

THAAAAA YANKEES WIIIIIIN

2005-05-01T03:11:01Z

Finally won a game, thank GOD. I went 2-4... haha, still have the best average on the team! I AM SUCH A LEADER! ~~AND STILL THE PRETTIEST.~~ Sorry, I don't knwo where that came from, I'm usually really humble and stuff. Guess my emotions are just running high. I'll be so glad when it's not April anymore.

Anyway, it's Saturday night and you know what that means - time to hit the clubs! I need a new girlfriend, maybe someone hott will be out tonight. You never know. ;)

Jeter out

captainderek @ 2005-04-29T14:48:00

2005-04-29T18:51:49Z

You know what I think is really sad? When people have to be drama queens and instigate stuff to get attention. I think it's better to channel my energy into being a better player, or doing charity work, or doing yoga and making myself a better human being. hidekisan, my man, you know what I'm talking about. yeah

Not that I know anyone who is a huge drama queen or anything, just a random observation.

captainderek @ 2005-04-29T12:06:00

2005-04-29T16:12:57Z

I feel like a total loser. I didn't end up going out last night... Tino said he was going to bring "a friend" and I didn't really feel like meeting new people, so I just stayed in. There was nothing in the fridge except a few bottles of Cristal and some month-old shrimp cocktail (oh and some Baccardi Breezers that AR left here the last time he stopped by), so I ordered some pizza and ate the whole thing and now I feel like a total cow. Blah!

Anyway, I'm just taking a break from workouts to update because I felt like I was going to heave (stupid pizza). We're playing Toronto AGAIN today. I am so sick of the AL East! Oh well, back to the field. I have to set a good example and be captain-y and stuff. I know if I don't there's bound to be someone who wants desperately to take my place even though I am the face of the Yankees and therefore nobody can take my place because I am awesome and everyone likes me best. Not that I'm talking about anyone in particular.

captainderek @ 2005-04-28T23:36:00

2005-04-29T03:45:35Z

Hey guys, sorry I haven't been updating (but what else is new?) The beginning of the season is always really busy. Plus, I've been really depressed lately. The team is *SUCKING*, AR is the only one getting any attention even though I am totally better, and even having Tino back isn't making me feel any better. I mean, we were 1.5 games behind the DEVIL RAYS for gosh sake. We're not anymore, but we're still playing like crap. At least the rest of the league is having problems, too, like a lot of pitchers going on the DL and stuff (I'm not talking about any team in particular or anything) and I'm sure we'll catch up because we always do but it's still really annoying. This isn't the same team it used to be, man.

Ok, I'm gonna go catch a bite with Tino and maybe call up Darryl and see if he has any new protein powder. I heard Lindsay Lohan might be around and I know she likes protein shakes too, maybe we can share recipes or something.

OH BUT BEFORE I FORGET just wanted to give a shoutout to all my new LJ friends: hidekisan and little_unit. I heard some of the Red Sox players got LJs too but I don't know them. Oh well.

captainderek @ 2005-04-12T14:38:00

2005-04-12T18:45:52Z

Sorry I haven't updated much lately. I've been wicked busy with the season starting and stuff. The first series with the Red Sox was pretty good, although we should have swept them. The Orioles series was totally uncool. Jaret Wright is a total loser so I'm not really surprised we lost that game, but then even RJ couldn't beat them. Joe looked like he was going to puke every time I went back to the dugout.

So yesterday kinda sucked. George made us all sit in the dugout to watch the Red Sox get their rings for like eight hours (YAWN) instead of watching DVDs in the clubhouse like we usually do. And A-Rod got a way bigger boo at Fenway than I did. They didn't even chant "Jeee-terrr" once yesterday, and I heard "AAAAA-Roddd" at least twice. WTF? I'm hitting at least 100 points higher than that tool and they still didn't boo me. I don't know what I need to do to make them hate me again... maybe I'll hit a line drive off Schilling's foot tomorrow, that should do it.

Also, they gave Mo a standing O. He seemed to think it was really funny, but I don't understand why they were clapping for him. I thought they didn't like us? Whatever.

Oh, and we lost wicked bad and I struck out a couple times. That sucked.

After the game me and Tino (I'M SO GLAD HE'S BACK) hung out with Wells at the Foxy Lady. Not my kind of bar, really, but it was cool to see Boomer again.

Spring training fever

2005-02-20T21:26:58Z

Well, it's almost time to head down to Legends. I'm going to miss the city - going out dancing with my friends, making Visa commercials with Steinbrenner, making "I live for this" commercials for MLB, eating at fancy restaurants, and stuff (I totally messed up with carbs last night, too). Now I'm going to have to get really serious about working out and being a captain and stuff.

Speaking of which, it seems like everyone on the team is mad at eachother lately and as captain it's my job to make everyone like eachother and get along and now say mean things about eachother anymore. It's going to be tough. Those stupid Red Sox players are being jerks to everyone too, which makes matters worse - nobody defends eachother any more! (Although I have to say it was kinda funny when T.N. said that thing about being a dad... hehe)

Anyway I gg, I'm supposed to go out tonight again before I have to fly out tomorrow.

Jeter out!

Ungh.

2005-02-16T15:19:55Z

Aw, man. Sorry I haven't updated in forever. I went on a craaaazy protein shake bender - who knew that stuff could make you so insane? - and I still feel like crap. I'm never going to show A.R. up in spring training now.

Valentine's Day was pretty cool. I don't usually answer most of my mail (shh, don't tell) but my PR girl sent me a sample of the cards that I got. Some of my fans are a little nuts - one guy sent me naked pictures, and let me tell you, when you're used to seeing athlete physiques in the locker room, a 5'10" 400lb dude with grizzly bear chest hair is kind of a shock. *shudder* Another girl wrote me a poem:

Roses are red
A-Rod's lips are blue
You're the hottest Yankee ever
and I want to have your babies please call me (212) xxx-xxx.

It doesn't rhyme but I got a kick out of it anyway. I only got three marriage proposals this year, which was a little disappointing, since last year I had twenty, but I guess that's to be expected as I get older. Sigh.

I better hit the gym, it's already 10:30 and I feel like a total slacker. I'm not going to eat anything today either, except maybe some Diet Coke (no calories!) when I watch "Lost" tonight. That show is so good.

Jeter out!

I <3 protein

2005-02-03T23:35:18Z

omg you guys Darryl is sooooooooooo my new best friend ever. I need more protein powder.

Ow.

2005-02-02T14:25:28Z

I'm so tired. I read this article last night about how much A.R. works out and, being that I'm the captain and therefore should be the hardest worker on the team, I decided that I would try to do the same thing.

I went to bed at like 10:00 last night and I would of woken up at 4am to start working out but (and I swear he did this on purpose) A.R. called me at like 2am and started yelling drunkenly about shrimp ties. And then I think he accused me of being with Mariah again. I have no idea what he was talking about.

Anyway, this morning I had possibly the worst workout ever. I was totally tired and dehydrated, and I think I sprained my thumb shagging fly balls. I caught it right at the first base line, but then I got carried away and ended up in the right field stands. That keeps happening to me. Luckily the trainer had just gotten in and he held a gauze pad on my thumb for ten minutes. I think that will help.

Ok, I'm gonna go have a protein shake (Sheff gave me this special powder the other day, he said he got it from Darryl Strawberry. I didn't know he was still playing, but I guess he knows a lot about supplements) and then take a nap.

I think I might call O'Neill later and see if he wants to go to Wonder Bar tonight. I need to go dancing to relax.

OMG

2005-02-02T02:27:39Z

Okay so I don't know if any of you remember but after Game 7 this year I got really really drunk and I woke up in my bed wearing a pair of women's underwear and blue lipstick and couldn't remember what happened. But I was looking on the Internets and I found this:

OMG Scarlett is gonna be so pissed off.

sigh

2005-02-02T00:48:23Z

I'm getting really depressed again. Everyone says I have to stop living in the past, but I can't stop thinking about 1999. I feel like all my real friends are gone and now all the people I have to hang out with are phonies. Except J.P. He's still cool.

A.R. is still stalking me.

I miss Tino.